Tips for getting married
Tips on Getting Married
There are thousands if not millions of ideas available to you on wedding websites, blogs, podcasts and social media posts that offer generic wedding planning solutions, with the usual to do lists, diaries and systems available. Many couples tell me that a lot of these options are completely daunting and often irrelevant for the style of event they are dreaming about, especially since Covid 19 in 2020 where couples have since evaluated the whole thinking around a traditional wedding, considering the stress involved in organizing one that could potentially be cancelled at a tip of a hat.
Alternatively you could hold a micro wedding celebration, inviting only a small group to join you at a desired destination or a simple elopement with just the two of you. Investing your savings into an epic destination with life long memories. Whatever you decide please never lose site of what the event is really about, “two people publicly affirming their choice of life partner and of course their love for each other”. Too often brides get wrapped up in the whole planning scenario, wanting to add everything she had ever imagined, often forgetting the reality of her budget. Remember less clutter and more quality often leaves a greater impression, as well as a better bank balance and a cleaner environmental impact at the end of the day.
For those “Do it yourself” brides, There are planning lists available on the internet, mostly working around the 1 year planning calendar, with a month by month to do lists that quite often isn’t relevant when planning your own event, however it can be a good starting point or at least a guide to help you.
For those less confident in taking on the task themselves, the alternative is to enlist a professional event consultant to support and advise you, holding you accountable to your budget as well as the day to day planning, saving you time and effort with their tried and tested local database to suit all your needs but most importantly your stress levels.
Most professionals in their field have done the hard graft already with their own Itinerary builders and lists of approved services and product providers who can guarantee a high standard of service, adding confidence that you are working with a team who combine well together under one umbrella and direction.
A wedding consultant will often offer their service at a set fee, without making any commissions and will work solely for your interests to gain the best deals possible, invisibly making savings on your budget justifying your initial investment in their skills and service’s.
By extending their consultants service you can take advantage of their seasoned event planning experience to create your day, you will have every detail considered, even down to the safety of your guests. They will be responsible to check terms and conditions and negotiate with all providers on your behalf. They will already have great working relationships with those they recommend, undoubtedly this will improve the flow and communication on the day, as well as guarantee a unified atmosphere, uplifting the over all experience.
It then makes sense to continue this bond with your wedding planner to coordinate on the days events. By using the same person or team, most the hard work is already done. They will know everyone involved and create the itinerary for the vendors delivery and collection timeline. All the vendors will respect the coordinators role and communication should be a breeze. They will manage the team to insure everything is prepared in good time and cleaned up again at the end of the day. The most valued part of their role is the one to deal with any unforeseen issues that arise. These will be dealt with in a way where no one should be inadvertently effected by the problem, or if unavoidable an alternative resolve is put in action.
Investing in a wedding professional and upgrading their skills to planning and coordinating is obviously a financial commitment that many consider to expensive and decide to do without, however when weighed up against the potential headaches and losses of planning your own event or asking a close family members or friends the risks are worrying: You actually have little control and denying those who accept the task to forgo the celebration on the day with you can be catastrophic to your relationships. They will be put under a great deal of emotional stress and expectation and it is quite a common result to end in life long fall outs. By budgeting in and affording these professional services, you’re buying yourself freedom and quality time doing the things you really want to do with your partner, family and friends, as your professional provider plans the logistics of your day all the way to post wedding celebration, without that emotional attachment and with a clear strategy and mind.
It’s All About You
Tips that a wedding planning professional can advise on and work through with you;
First inquiry: Most inquiries are via a google search and made through a website which will start the ball rolling and we advise that most communication should be by e-mail, keeping track of all conversations and decision making. Do some due diligence on those you chose to employ, checking their social media pages, any awards and reviews. Are the reviews genuine? how many years have they been in business? are they a registered company? etc.
Wedding Planning Meetings: After the initial inquiry and e-mail communication the consultant assigned to your event will either physically meet with you over coffee or via the virtual internet platforms available to you. At this stage decisions don’t need to be confirmed, as its more of an interview to get to know each other and understand the style of your event. Form there a plan is developed in stages and within your budget. Depending on the package you chose, will govern the level of help you require. Each meeting will establish the next step for you to take in your planning journey for example; booking the higher priorities, such as your venue, celebrant, catering & photographer, followed by the less pressing needs of your event; theme, colour etc. These meetings will walk you through each element of your wedding planning in a calm and effective manor.
Reserving your wedding date: All providers will pencil your suggested date in their diary and once confirmed require a deposit to secure it. This is often your first headache, when you realize not all professionals will be available on that date.
Story Boards: A physical story board before you start your planning is a great way for a couple to work together on the vision of the day. Remember this day is for both of you and the more input you can do together from the beginning the more united you will be to take on responsibility down the line. The board does not need to be created overnight, you can take weeks over it, in fact it may never end as you see new ideas develop and it could go on into your married life. Apps such as Pinterest are an other great way to compile ideas and easily share them with each other or others.
Wedding Planning File: We highly recommend a wedding clip file be kept. This can be a physical folder and/or on the internet. The physical folder can keep all your receipts, business cards etc in order. Your professional planner/coordinator will also keep a file together on your behalf or preferably a joint one on google docs for example, where up to date changes can be viewed instantly, keeping track of each conversation and transaction. A good consultant will contribute to this in ways you will never even think about, such as a safety plan for example, all added value to insure a perfect day.
Confirming your Ceremony and Reception Venue: This is one of the most important booking confirmation and deposit to be paid, as the best options will be fully booked some time in advance. With your consultant discuss the options available to you. The consultant will work closely with many providers in their region, working directly with their team will save you time, money and complication.
Celebrant and Master of Celebration: Again, the best celebrants and MC’s are often booked well in advance and for international couples we advise you to consider booking a week day event to save disappointment in any high season and possible save money, as better deals can be negotiated. The Dream Maker has its own approved New Zealand Registered Celebrants and will advise on the best person for your location and needs and personality. Never under estimate the importance of finding a great celebrant, preferably they have invested in themselves to become a Celebrant Association Member. (CANZ) which gives them public liability insurance and up to date industry information. Neither should you take it lightly, the time and effort invested to create a uniquely heart felt ceremony as well as meetings and calls in all hours of the day and evening and trips for meetings and rehearsals etc. Its huge value for money and the one thing you can not go without!
Official Paper Work: If you are planning a legal marriage, then it is important to know the rules. Your celebrant will help you order your license and certificate but they are not responsible for obtaining it or for the payments. If you are travelling from outside the country and are not a national please, please do your due diligence in good time, as all countries have their own rules
Confirming your photographer and/or Videographer: Your consultant will advise you on the best options to suit your needs. Your perfect photography and/or video depends on two things, firstly your budget and then the style that you like. Consideration must be thought about particularly in relations to your location. Its best to employ a professional who is experienced to cope with the environment they will be working in and the limited space for their equipment should you be chartering transport. be aware that most photographers retain full ownership of the photos providing copies to the couple, with limitations of there use. Check their terms and hold that discussion before handing over any money.
Meeting with Vendors: Most consultants will introduce you directly to the the vendor unless it is a package deal. You will have the opportunity to discuss your needs and desires with them. Once the plan for each product or service has been discussed your planner/coordinator will discuss the budget and make the final confirmations on your behalf.
Confirmation for each Vendor: Most bookings will be held for up to 48 hours/2 weeks but will require a non refundable (transferable) deposit to secure the service and date. All other payments will be required up-front at least 1 month prior to the event date
Wedding Website: You may like to consider having a wedding website committed to your own wedding day. There is great advantages for you, to let your guests have access to everything about your day and follow your planning story and dreams. further advantage is it provide a google map and up to the minute instructions, if you had the need to go into Plan B scenario. Everyone can easily find the contact numbers for the key people involved if needed. your consultant can advise on a website that will suit you and many are free.
Insurance: This is going to be a big investment for you and well worth considering taking out specific insurance in case of a situation out of your control. Unfortunately since the Covid 19 situation in 2020, you can not insure against a global or local pandemic, so there is still an element of risk. However by working through a wedding consultant and planner you can make sure they negotiate terms that suite you and there should never be an issue with a transfer to an alternative date (less expenses) within a reasonable amount of notice (1 month or more)
D.I.Y Planning: If you have decided to self plan but still require a coordinator on the day it is important to provide the coordinator all the contacts of those vendors involved in good time, so they can be fully prepared. They can then communicate with the vendors directly to introduce themselves and to insure everyone is aware that they are in control of your expectations on the day resulting in a smooth and a perfectly run event.
PLAN B: I can not emphasis enough how important it is to take your Plan B options seriously and give them as much attention to detail as your Plan A. In the event that a Plan B must is called, you and the team will be fully prepared and if you have taken time over planning it, you wont be disappointed. It is worth considering investing in holding your Plan B venue, or if you have used a professional planner, they could negotiate that it is part of the deal in booking their event for the reception. Holding a advanced-wedding brief with the team will give everyone involved time to understand the options and the part they play in it.
Payments: in most instances the couple will pay the vendor directly, giving them more control, however a packaged deal will require one direct payment to the event planner, who will then distribute the payments directly onto the vendors. These packages are often very cost effective, as all vendors involved provide their very best deal available.
Deposits: Deposits are made to secure your even products and services and mostly are non refundable. The best efforts are made to negotiate a transferable deposit in unforeseen circumstances but this will be less any costs involved and be dependent on all the provider being available for the new date. Venues and hire companies are likely to ask for a refundable breakages deposit. These will normally be refunded within 14 working days after the event if everything is left, clean, tidy and unbroken. Should this not be the case then a report and breakdown for replacements will be given with deductions or even an invoice if the damages or costs are greater than the original deposit. This must be paid immediately unless disputed. If there is a dispute an official complaint must be made to your consultant within 36 hours on receipt of the document, who will do all they can to mediate the issues for a quick resolve. As a last resort a professional mediator maybe required and further costs maybe incurred.
National Parks & Private Land: If you are going to hold your celebration inside public land you may need a permit from the council provider or the Department of Conservation (DoC) few companies hold these expensive concessions secure you are planning your event under any rules required and we advise you ask the departments directly. However The Dream Maker has invested in the required documentation for places such as the Kahurangi, Abel Tasman and Nelson Lakes locations as well as other variations for small areas managed by DoC. Using a Dream Maker package and/or service includes this permit at a fraction of the price . All Dream Maker approved vendors can work under their permit.
Preparing yourselves: Booking time off work for your event well in advance is crucial, with several days before hand to relax and finish your final bits and bobs. Other appointments in relation to your event, hair, grooming, manicure etc, need to be booked well in advance. The one thing couples often leave to the last minute is preparing themselves; their general health a happy weight, skin and hair, all helps to create that stunning look and feel good emotion but takes time and effort. We advise you look at this as an opportunity to make it a life changing experience to be happier and healthier as a couple and creating great new habits to enjoy a quality life together. Simple diet changes will help your weight and skin condition, finding activities you both enjoy will contribute to life long fun together keeping your stress levels under control..
Guests: Create a list of guests from both sides of the family who are your favorite people who have supported you throughout your life. This list has several considerations to your budget and time; the more people you invite, means the less time you have for those you really want to spend time with. Over sea guests may need more planning time to book travel and accommodation, so a save the date e-mail for advanced notice will give you a quick and good indication of who will attend or not. Obviously since the Covid 19 out break the whole expectations on over seas guests has changed, as their investment in that journey is less likely to be covered by insurance in such an unsure crisis. By sending save the date emails, you can save on invitation costs; if you know some definitely won’t make it. You will also need to ask about mobility and diet considerations for example in your RSVP. If you have chosen to have a website you can forward the link to keep them informed of all developments and make contact easy with your wedding dedicated email address and telephone numbers.
Invitations & Keeping Track: These days there all sorts of ways to send invitations. We would suggest putting a database together; keeping a list of all the people you want to invite and a record of when you sent the “Save the Date” reply of intention to attend Actual invitation sent and reply of attendance etc. This database will help to send reminders for those who didn’t reply, which does happen, yet they still turn up, which can be embarrassing. It’s also important to have this list easily accessible to call on in an emergency, so recording their mobile numbers on the list is crucial. Your Consultant will supply a template if you wish.
Key players: who are the key players of the event: Along with your data base you will also need to pull out the key players and record their details, job, contact on the day etc; Bridal party attendants - bridesmaid(s)- best man- groomsmen- ushers- pageboy- flower girl-those to give readings or play pieces of music or singing solo at the ceremony etc. You will also need to consider people for: Master of Ceremonies (We can help with that) -those to make speeches at the reception etc
Other Jobs requiring an allocated responsible person: Its helpful to empower friends and family to take charge of small elements throughout the day, that as a couple you won’t want to worry about for example; to pack up the wedding gifts and pack the cake and mail to those who couldn’t attend, who is responsible to look after the wedding license once the Celebrant has finished? Who will look after the wedding dress and return suit hire etc? Again all these people need to be added to the database.
Children: If you have children at your event it should be an important consideration to employ someone to be responsible for them. They deserve to have fun too. It allows parents to enjoy the day in confidence, the children will be entertained and cared for. Your consultant will provide advice on approved child care services and children entertainment. Happy or unhappy children can make or break a day for many.
Transport: Transport covers a large consideration. Depending on your ceremony location and distance from the reception you might like to consider a bus service for guests, even picking up and dropping guests back door to door to their accommodation safely. As the couple you are responsible for your guests to get home safely. There are several modes of specialized transport for the bridle party too from helicopters to boat charters depending on your ceremony and reception venue. Your consultant is likely to have affiliations and can give good advice on the best mode of transport for your situation.
Flowers & Styling: These are important parts of your event and worth confirming as early as possible; however the finer detail won’t need to be discussed until closer to the time of your event. Considering the environment is very important these days and using a local independent florist, who may grow some of their own stock will help with that environmental impact. We encourage against plastic items,balloons and glitter as these have a huge impact in our water ways, wild life and countryside. In-season and local flowers will be cheaper for you too. If you have a specific love of exotic flower you will need to give the florist plenty of notice to order these and expect a hefty price. Flax flowers need plenty of notice as they must be died and created of course. Any tables flowers left over, we love to donate them to our local nursing homes.
Wedding Cake: Again, in discussion with your consultant, who will be able to advice on the best cake creators for your style and budget of sweet treats. There are many things to consider above the obvious, for example: deciding if you are going to send a piece of your cake to those guests unable to attend? In this case you will need to prepare mailing boxes and a fruit cake without fresh cream will travels better. Knowing your guests diet needs is important too, to make sure there is alternative or consideration for them. Alternative ideas can be a selection of cheeses. Any left overs we have a habit of donating them to our local nursing homes.
Gifts: Some couples like to give out gift lists and it could be a consideration to ask for a gift in way of a contributions towards an activities for your honeymoon for example. We advise you only give a list of ideas to those guests asking or let them know you will have a wishing well for example at the event. Because we work in incredibly beautiful locations we also suggest a donation to the charitable trusts who maintain these environments and its wild life. These can be recorded in your name, as your contribution to the environmental foot print you make during your event.
Wedding Attire: There is a wide range of wedding ceremony location ideas, your wedding attire need to be thought through to compliment that location. A long dresses for example, can potentially be a safety hazard or susceptible to damaged. Discuss this with your consultant before setting your mind on a design; they can also give advice on where to purchase your items.
We trust this has been helpful to you and invite to get in touch for a friendly chat and for further assistance. you will find our services and locations on our website but we are not confind to these.
